Why Is Our Nation So Divided Today?

I have a theory about why our nation feels so divided today.  I've been pondering this because it feels as if we are as polarized as I have ever seen in my half century of adulthood.

Here's my theory and a thought about how to make it different.


We ARE polarized

It is no news that we are polarized.  Americans voted last fall for two of the most polarizing presidential candidates in our history.  The candidates and the worldviews they represented could hardly have been more different, and the national popular vote was nearly equally divided.

Families and friends continue to deal with tensions stirred up during the political campaigns, election, inauguration, and first year of a new presidency.  Some relationships ended because of it.  Others remain on life support.

There is always a tension between conservative and liberal political views.  The wise are able to maintain relationships with people with different views.  But many of us surround ourselves with those of like opinions and hold at arms length those with conflicting views.

Social media exacerbate the polarization

Pew Research reported that in 2016 approximately 70% of Americans were FaceBooking, and the majority of Americans now report social media are how they get their news.   Therefore, this information channel and its quality and content of it have a great impact on how we view the world.

But the content is not the same for everyone!  FaceBook automatically creates a kind of echo chamber for each of us.  Every time we "like" a post or visit a sponsor page we are telling FaceBook what we prefer.  And FaceBook knows that we will spend more time if we like what we read.  If I am a liberal, FaceBook will dutifully provide more posts, ads, and other material that fit that perspective on the world.  If I am a conservative, the same happens with conservative material.  My "feed" will be largely comprised of stories and shares from friends and advertisers who agree with me.

This means that on any major issue, FaceBook is constantly juggling our individual feeds to provide the best mix of what we seem to want to see......which has the salutary (for FaceBook) effect of creating more revenue.

I'm not mad at FaceBook.  It's just a company doing what companies do: making money.  They aren't trying to create problems over in Menlo Park, but they are.

Mainstream news media provide misleading information

Neither am I mad at the news media.  They are also just doing what companies do.  They aren't trying to make problems either (well, some like Russia Today, are) in newsrooms all over the world, but they are.  Here's how: crisis, conflict and blood provide the most eyeballs and therefore the best revenue.  "If it bleeds it leads" is still the rule of thumb in newsrooms.

Where there is a march or a civil disturbance, for example, the coverage centers on the tiny minority burning flags, breaking windows, fighting, or generally rioting.  The coverage of the main march where people put feet to their strongly held beliefs is limited.  No arson, no blood: no coverage.

To me, this means that the news media have an inherent context bias.  At worst, the political and cultural biases of individual reporters, producers and owners provide us with a skewed view of what is really happening world.  Some deliberately disinform.


The trust of Americans in the mainstream media touched a new low in 2016, Gallup reports.  Only 1 in 3 Americans reported "a great deal or fair amount of trust in the media."

Foreign actors are stirring up dissension 


We thought the Russian government was trying to influence the election.  Recent reports suggests they WERE trying to do just that, but that was and is only one of their intentions.  They want to create tears in the fabric of the institutions and culture that sustains our republic.  They want to inflame racial tensions, sow distrust of leaders and create chaos.

We have mislaid our ability to honor one another

The final part of my theory is that we as a people have mislaid our ability to honor one another.  Instead of listening to one another with respect, we sharpen our knives.  Honestly stated opinions are often met with unkind words and even ad hominum attacks.  I know that there have always been those who attack others with words, but somehow it seems to have been less common in times past.  We were once a more civil society.  Today, with the shield of Internet anonymity, unkindness or even viciousness is common.

Towards a solution

I believe the answer to these problems is simple: a return to honor.  But simple is often not easy.

Honor is multifaceted, of course, but if we could find our way back to civil discourse, if we could treat others as we would like to be treated, if we could.....well.....love,  much could be changed for the good.

Finally: America has weathered worse (think Civil War era) and today there is more that unites us than divides.  I have every expectation that we shall pass through these dark days into a greater society that gives hope.

So....there's my theory and ideas towards a solution.  I would really like to hear your thoughts on how we can move towards a society that goes forward together, regardless of our differing political and cultural opinions.   Please leave comments below.

Only Love Will Drive Out Hate

Ulysses S. Grant -- Civil War General and U.S. President

In these days of intensifying tribalism in America, it's helpful to look back to earlier hard times in our nation.   I was struck recently by something moving in the recollections of President Ulysses S. Grant as he wrote of his experience as a Civil War general, the general who, along with Abraham Lincoln, saved the Union.

Grant was traveling on horseback in late June, 1862, on his way to Memphis.   Except for various outposts, this was Confederate territory, only lightly held by Union troops.

Watch what happens when men of honor meet; men who hold quite different perspectives (emphasis added):

I halted at La Grange. General Hurlbut was in command there at the time and had his headquarters tents pitched on the lawn of a very commodious country house. The proprietor was at home and, learning of my arrival, he invited General Hurlbut and me to dine with him. 

I accepted the invitation and spent a very pleasant afternoon with my host, who was a thorough Southern gentleman fully convinced of the justice of secession. 

After dinner, seated in the capacious porch, he entertained me with a recital of the services he was rendering the cause. He was too old to be in the ranks himself--he must have been quite seventy then--but his means enabled him to be useful in other ways. 

In ordinary times the homestead where he was now living produced the bread and meat to supply the slaves on his main plantation, in the low-lands of Mississippi. Now he raised food and forage on both places, and thought he would have that year a surplus sufficient to feed three hundred families of poor men who had gone into the war and left their families dependent upon the "patriotism" of those better off. 

The crops around me looked fine, and I had at the moment an idea that about the time they were ready to be gathered the "Yankee" troops would be in the neighborhood and harvest them for the benefit of those engaged in the suppression of the rebellion instead of its support. 

I felt, however, the greatest respect for the candor of my host and for his zeal in a cause he thoroughly believed in, though our views were as wide apart as it is possible to conceive.

Grant could have had the gentleman imprisoned.  Instead, they listened to one another with honor, and, no doubt, took their leave with courteous words.

Today, it feels as if we a nation degenerating into rival tribes based on perceived identities.  One pictures tribesmen with shields and spears shouting and brandishing their weapons in defiance at one another, each tribe nursing grievances toward the other.

Martin Luther King wrote this: "Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”

If Dr King is right, and I believe he is, then it also seems right that "We will never with hate drive out the hate of those who hate from the left or from the right.  Only love will drive out hate."

A Civil War General's Powerful Words to His Wife

Men, this is for us.  Ladies, you are welcome to read on if you like, but I have an an inspiration and an observation for my brothers.

I'm reading American Ulysses: A Life of Ulysses S. Grant by Ronald C. White Jr.  In it I am finding some powerful insights into the life of this giant of America's past.

As Grant continued to win victory after victory in the Civil War, his fame began to spread.  Not only did his troops admire him, he was widely admired among civilians in the North.  After pivotal victories at Vicksburg and Chattanooga, he was promoted to Lieutenant General, the second American to have held the highest (at that time) rank in the military.  The first was George Washington.

Julia Grant, wife of Ulysses S. Grant

Grant's affection for his wife Julia was deep and life-long, and fame took its toll on them both.  White paints one vignette of this:

"While in St. Louis {after Grant's promotion to Lt. General}, Julia, self-conscious now that her husband had become so famous, decided she needed to do something about her appearance. Long concerned by her strabismus, often referred to as cross-eyed, she would not face the camera when someone wanted to take her photograph. 

She turned to Dr. Charles A. Pope, dean of the St. Louis Medical College. Pope told her it was too late to perform an operation on her eyes. Devastated, she confessed to her husband her intention and disappointment. 

Ulysses, startled, replied, “What in the world put such a thought in your head, Julia?” 

“Why, you are getting to be such a great man and I am such a plain little wife. I thought if my eyes were as others are I might not be so very, very plain.” 

Ulysses drew her to him and said, “Did I not see you and fall in love with you with these same eyes? I like them just as they are, and now, remember, you are not to interfere with them.""

Brothers, whether we are married or single, there are important women in our lives: wives, daughters, sisters, girl friends, and others.  If our relationships with them are good, our words have great impact.  Grant's words telegraphed that he really, really saw her.....that his gaze reached into her soul, and that he saw the real beauty in her, not just surface beauty.  We can do that, too.

Grant's simple words to his beloved must have been powerfully important to her self image in those days.....days that were to become much more public for a country girl from the American mid-West.

We can do the same for the women that are around us.  We can focus on the gold that is within and when opportunities arise for honest praise, we can tell them about the gold we see.  It's easy to see imperfections and shortcomings.  Anyone can do that.  It is the work of the Kingdom, however, to see gold in others, and to help them see it in themselves.

Not only did Grant do this for his bride, but he did it even for his subordinates.  Most of his men loved and admired Grant, both because he was ending the war with superior skill, and because he treated them with respect and honor.  He even treated vanquished foes with honor.  This tells me that if the commander of all the armies of the Union can treat others with respect and honor, it's something that we can do as well.......first in our relationships with our families, and then with others around us.

Finally.....just an observation: we 21st century Americans are inundated with information about the personalities around us, more so than ever before.  It is a blessing and a problem.  It is a blessing to have access to so much information.  It's also a problem because men and women of earlier generations have much to say if we will only listen.....and sometimes it's hard to hear them with all the insistent voices of today.

With the telegraph, Civil War era Americans had better and more timely information than generations before.  Even then, however, literate Americans had a broad knowledge of the words  of the earlier giants of America and Europe, and even of Classical antiquity.  I wonder if these 19th century Americans were better educated than we.

As I have focused my attention on this Grant biography, I am reminded again of the richness of America's past and the giants that walked our land yesterday....giants whose words I want to hear to help me understand today and plan for tomorrow.

Read next: 
On The Christian Duty to Honor the Emperors of Today

On The Christian Duty to Honor the Emperors of Today

Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor President Obama and President-elect Trump.

I exchanged the names of our current and incoming presidents for "emperor" to fit our day, but other than that, these words are scripture (1 Peter 2:17 NIV).

I stand convicted on this. I have too often missed the mark. I'm particularly struck by the last part: "Honor the emperor"......because I have not always honored our "emperor", Mr. Obama.

As Peter was writing this from Rome around 65 A.D. the current emperor would have been Nero, the mad tyrant who tortured Christians, and according to Church tradition, finally crucified the apostle. Clearly, Peter was not saying honor the emperor because he deserved it.

So.....with that in mind, what right do I or any of us have to dishonor President Obama or President-Elect Trump with our words or deeds?

That being so, the question for us is this: how do we Jesus followers honorably disagree with the policies and deeds of the "emperor" of our day, or express concerns about fitness for office, while still obeying the command of scripture?

Peter's apostolic colleague, Paul, also had something to say about this matter: "First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way."  (1 Timothy 2:1-2)

Prayer and intercession for those who lead in our communities, states and national government goes hand in hand with honoring these men and women.

We are clearly in a different situation than the first century Church.  For just one thing, in our system of government, we select the leaders of our land. Expressing our opinions is important.

Nevertheless, I believe the apostle Peter's words apply just as much in these days as they did for those who lived in his day. It seems to me that the issue is a matter of honoring the emperor in our hearts… when we do this our words will reflect that heart posture.

I have deep disagreements with much of Mr Obama's policies and deeds, and I have deeply questioned his fitness for office.  While I have great hope for Mr. Trump, at this point his policies, deeds and fitness can only be guessed at.  I do have great concerns about what I have read about his fitness for office and his past deeds.  Questioning and outright disagreeing with both of these men is my right as an American, and indeed, as a human.

Where I…..and any of us who are Christians go off the rails is when we attack the person, rather than his deeds, his policies, or his preparation for office.

We also go off the rails when we gossip. In the context of FaceBook and other social media, gossip also includes sharing information from others that we have not verified as truthful.  The amount of untruthful or questionable information being gossiped on FaceBook today is staggering.

I'm still unpacking the import of Peter's words as it relates to us today. I would be quite interested to hear what you think.

A Civil War General's Words Still Inspire Still Today

I'm currently reading American Ulysses by Ronald C. White,  a new biography of Ulysses S. Grant, the American Civil War general who more than any other made Union victory possible.  There are all kinds of fascinating insights into the life of this extraordinary American here; but I'll mention just three.

Grant captured Confederate forts Henry and Donelson on the Tennessee and Cumberland rivers.  This was an important victory for the Union both strategically and politically.  Two of the forts' commanders fled leaving CSA General Simon Bolivar Buckner, Grant's former West Point classmate, in command.

Buckner asked for terms of surrender, expecting a negotiation.  Grant, woken from a sound sleep by an aide bringing Buckner's surrender note, replied with a note of his own:  "No terms except an unconditional and immediate surrender can be accepted. I propose to move immediately upon your works {fortifications}."

Grant's words were telegraphed across country and widely reprinted.  They resonated strongly in Civil War era America, and still inspire today.  They earned him the nickname, "Unconditional Surrender Grant", a play on his name and initials.

In accepting Buckner's surrender, "as Grant smoked a cigar, they talked about the size of the opposing armies. Buckner expressed surprise at the small size of Grant’s force, the Confederates having believed the number to be fifty thousand. “If I had been in command,” he said, aggravated that Grant had been able to attack the fort with so few men, “you would not have reached the fort so easily.” “If you had {been in command instead of the other generals},” Grant said  smiling, “I would have waited for reinforcements."

As he did with Buckner, Grant consistently honored his opponents in gray.  Here's another example, when Grant was asked about the victory ceremony in which the confederates would stack their rifles and the commander's sword surrendered:

"The surrender is now a fact; we have the fort, the men, the guns. Why should we go through vain forms, and mortify and injure the spirit of brave men, who, after all are our own countrymen and brothers."

Honoring our opponents in business, politics and debate, is a good lesson for us all, perhaps summed up in the words of a more recent fighter, Col. Tim Collins: if you are ferocious in battle remember to be magnanimous in victory.  

Read Next:
On The Christian Duty to Honor the Emperors of Today

Love Broke Through

A recent love lesson in my life was a paradigm-shifting kind of lesson....the kind that takes me to a different place, the kind that demonstrates a perspective I never fully understood before.

In that love lesson, I saw love break through a tough shell that nothing else would have touched.  It left me humbled, grateful.....and more focused than ever on a life of demonstrated love.

The lesson began on a visit to San Francisco as I was walking on El Camino Real from our hotel to a nearby grocery.  Just ahead of me were two couples that had obviously been drinking.  The angry words and waving arms of one couple intensified as they walked.

I pretended to not hear or see them as I quickly walked around them.  Ten minutes later, purchases in hand, I started my return trip to the hotel.  At the door of the store, the couple was ending their fight by angrily separating.  The husband turned back in the direction I had first encountered them.

Because we were going the same way on the same sidewalk and I walk fairly fast, I was soon abreast him.....and fighting the war in my mind: "no I don't want to talk with him."  "He won't want to hear what I have for him."

But I knew I had something for him.  So, as I came abreast I slowed and told him that I saw his pain but saw also that his heart was good.

He was angry still!  He told me to keep moving, that it was none of my business, and that he didn't want Jesus.

So, I smiled at him and resumed my pace.

But then, a few seconds later, he said from behind me, "what have you got?"

I turned and let him catch up with me and we walked on together.  What I told him, in essence, was that I too was married, and marriage was hard sometimes.  I told him that I could see his heart was good.   As we so often say at Bethel, I "called out the gold" in him for several minutes.

Finally, we sat together for a while.  I continued to encourage him and tell him the good things in him that I saw.  He asked what church I was part of.   I told him that wasn't really so important....it's not which Jesus community of which we are apart that is as important as who is our King.

When I felt our conversation had come to an end, I asked if I could pray with him.  I prophesied over him that the love that already was in his heart would grow and grow until if filled him and spattered out over his family and his marriage, and onto his friends who would wonder what had happened to him.

I did not speak about his obvious nearly drunken state, his cursing, or his vapes.  He did not need a list of problems in his life.  What he needed was to be loved.  What he needed was to hear that I could see that his heart was good and that he was loved right where he was ....... by the God of the universe, and by a brother.

After a bridge of love had been built, I gently offered some marriage advice from one brother to another.  I told him about some of my own life experiences, and about living an unoffended life.

When I stood up to go, he knew that God had spoken to him through me.  "God sent you to me!", he said.

We never exchanged more than first names, and the communities in which we lived, so I don't know the outcome in his life of this conversation.  Love had broken through a tough wall of hurt and anger, shame and guilt and brought with it hope and life.

While I have often seen the power of love in the lives of people, this was an important lesson about loving those we do not know.